Being 33 weeks pregnant with another girl, I have come to the realization that there will be a lot of mirror time is my house. Once the wee lass’ reach their teen years, I honestly don’t think the poor man boy will ever see the bathroom again…
A friend of mine posted this article to Facebook: when your mother says she’s fat It really got me thinking about the importance of self-image. As mothers, how we see ourselves can very well effect how our daughters view their own reflections.
When I was a little girl, I remember thinking my mom was the most beautiful women in the world. With her dark flowing curls, soft perfect skin, classy clicking “lady shoes” and the delicate scent of her Oscar de la Renta perfume, there was never a doubt in my mind. I had the prettiest mom. Not only was she gorgeous! She was smart and funny! She was charismatic, classy and elegant! I wanted to be just like her. I remember putting on her shoes and clacking around the house pretending I was a classy lady too. You can imagine my surprise when, as I got older, I realized my stunning Mother didn’t appreciate her beauty like I did. She would get compliments and brush them off with a wave of her hand and roll of her eyes. I remember the first time I heard the word fat leave her lips. I was terribly confused. My mom wasn’t fat? As the years went by and my ideas and opinions of self-image changed. I still thought my mom was beautiful. She did not. I started reading teen magazines and was exposed to tons of images of long-legged, long-haired, thin and smiling girls and like many other girls my age, thought that was what I was supposed to look like. I wasn’t fat by any means but I thought I was. When did it happen? I don’t know to be perfectly honest. I just remember flipping through pages and pages, watching my favorite shows, staring wide-eyed at movies with pretty girls in pretty clothes and I wanted to look just like them. I look back at pictures of myself and shake my head in disgust. What the hell was I so worried about? Why wasn’t I just out having fun instead of pining over some boy and wondering if I was “his type.” HIS TYPE!! That’s a problem right there! There are so many young girls out there concerned about being who other people want them to be that they forget to be themselves! Somewhere, somehow I figured this out…
Beauty is not defined by what we see in a mirror. Sure we all want to be physically appealing, but that is NOT what real beauty is! Beauty is how we feel, inside. It’s how we carry ourselves, how we treat others, how we SEE others! Beauty is in what we create. A painting, a cake, a sculpture, a life. It’s in our daily lives and it shines through our eyes or a smile or a laugh. It doesn’t mean we have a perfect little nose placed in the perfect location on our perfect face. If we were all perfect…wouldn’t life be boring? If we were all the same…would we want to be different…
Sure there are things about me I wish I could change, are they really that big of a deal? No. Yeah I have a bigger nose, but I have big eyes and lips too so it all balances out. No I’m not “thin.” Do I care? Not really. If I was really dissatisfied with my weight I could always go to the gym and sculpt myself into a more desirable shape. But desirable to who? I like my hips! My thighs may touch at the top and we’re told that’s not attractive but I like em that way! I have a butt, I have boobs! Good god do I ever….My hair is frustratingly neither curly or straight but that just means it can be easily styled both ways 😉 The point I’m trying to make is that there isn’t nearly enough self loving women out there. We need step outside of the box and look at the bigger picture. We are who we are, we can’t change that and why should we want to? We are all beautiful in our own way, not the same way. Embrace different! And while you’re at it, don’t put some much value in looks alone! Sure I tell my daughter how gorgeous she is, but I also tell her that she’s smart and kind and funny. That I love her bravery and her carefree belly laugh.
I’m not sure if there was a hard point to this post. I’m not even sure it makes a whole lot of sense or sends a message or whatever! This is where my mind wandered to today so this is what you get 😛
Ladies, be kind to yourselves. Not only will it do you a world of good, but you never know who’s watching 😉
Miss K ❤
some of the most beautiful gals I know 😉
kikichiikii 